Name Game

My new Hell.

Youngest daughter has been on a tear these past several weeks about her name. Apparently, she hates her name, so now, because I signed a birth certificate with an "uncool" name I must endure the following.

Endlessly. Relentlesly.

Youngest: "Okay mom. Which name do you like best? Brittany, Ashley, or Meaghan..."
Me: " I hate them all."
Youngest: "Choose one."
Me: "OK. Ashley."
Youngest: " Not my favorite choice. If you could do it over again, if someone gave you $20,000, what name would you choose? Samantha, Erin, or Haley?"

This "fun" game has been going on for weeks now.

But she's heartless. Whenever she says "OK mom, what name do you like best?" I want to poke my eyes out with quilting needles.

Please make it stop. Please. Or else I'm going to court and officially changing her name to "Winnie." THEN she'll have something to really be pissed about.

It Wasn't Me!!!!! Honest!!!!

I DID NOT kill Anna Nicole Smith.

I meant to say that I am not responsible for not being able to write for so long. It was my Stupid Mentally Retarded Brain Damaged Drooling Booger Nosed Computer.

Proof? I needed to change some stuff. Tried for DAYS on my "rides to school on the short bus" computer at home and finally became so frustrated that I went to neighborhood drug dealer and bought some heroin.

And I didn't even HAVE to become an addict because I tried the same "switch over" on my work computer and LORDY LORDY IT'S A MIRACLE! It took me 5 minutes. FIVE minutes and here I am writing away.

Do you think they have computers in rehab?