SNOOZE
It occurred to me today just how amazingly boring my life is. If there was a "Boring Life Index," mine would fall somewhere in the "Critical" range.
More boring than C-Span. More boring than locally televised Selectman's Meetings. More boring than church, baby showers, and lettuce sandwiches.
Don't believe me? Well, the proof is in the Vanilla pudding:
1. Same job for 20 years.
2. I drive a Ford. Taurus. I can't even find it in the grocery store parking lot because there's always three dozen other cars that look exactly like it.
3. No boyfriend.
4. A couple of kids who are at that stage where my role is pretty much to drop them off and pick them up places. In my Ford Taurus.
5. The highlight of my day is reading the local paper: Obituaries and Police Blotter first.
Let me assure you that I'm not PERSONALLY boring... No Sireee! I'm super NON-BORING, in fact.! I'm like a frat party and the scariest roller coaster you ever went on all wrapped up in one person. And you can take THAT to the bank (which opens at 9 A.M. sharp and closes at 6 P.M except on Wednesdays and Saturdays).
So don't try to tell me I'm in denial about my "Boring" problem and then do some kind of "Intervention" thing on me. Nope. Not necessay for THIS totally non-boring gal!
But out of curiousity, is there some kind of rehab center for Boring People? Because I have this friend...
More boring than C-Span. More boring than locally televised Selectman's Meetings. More boring than church, baby showers, and lettuce sandwiches.
Don't believe me? Well, the proof is in the Vanilla pudding:
1. Same job for 20 years.
2. I drive a Ford. Taurus. I can't even find it in the grocery store parking lot because there's always three dozen other cars that look exactly like it.
3. No boyfriend.
4. A couple of kids who are at that stage where my role is pretty much to drop them off and pick them up places. In my Ford Taurus.
5. The highlight of my day is reading the local paper: Obituaries and Police Blotter first.
Let me assure you that I'm not PERSONALLY boring... No Sireee! I'm super NON-BORING, in fact.! I'm like a frat party and the scariest roller coaster you ever went on all wrapped up in one person. And you can take THAT to the bank (which opens at 9 A.M. sharp and closes at 6 P.M except on Wednesdays and Saturdays).
So don't try to tell me I'm in denial about my "Boring" problem and then do some kind of "Intervention" thing on me. Nope. Not necessay for THIS totally non-boring gal!
But out of curiousity, is there some kind of rehab center for Boring People? Because I have this friend...
posted by Bemisdown at 6:19 PM
10 Comments:
I'm here to tell you...you ain't boring. Trust me. I wouldn't check your blog three times a day if I thought you and your life were boring.
Notice I don't blog about my day-to-day life? Yeah.
So pass the wine, sweet potato pie, and Fritos!
Thanks Cake!!!!
From one non-boring to another, let's not go to the gym, open that bottle of wine and give ourselves a toast!
(do you have a corkscrew, by the way?) Then we can snack on Fritos, watch my brother race his new bike, and holler
"SWEET POTATO PIE!" when he crashes!
How non-boring is THAT? We can even bake a pie for Sparkle and put it on the windowsill...everyone should have a "cake" in thier lives!!!
Of COURSE I meant to say "From one non-boring PERSON to another..."
Obviously I ride the short bus to school.
Wednesday night is Taco Night!
Motheragawd,
I'm scared. Is there a "Boring" gene?
Clinky,
Taco Night? Sounds awesome!!! Is there a 12 Step Program I should join before I attend?
So how does it work..you get a shell and put lettuce in it? I'm going out on a limb here-do you think I could handle all of that excitement?
Suddenly life is looking better. A little scary, but better.
"Of COURSE I meant to say 'From one non-boring PERSON to another...'"
I never even noticed that "person" was missing...I'm suddenly a little nervous about the editing I did tonight.
Anyways, can we buy popcorn at Richard's race? Cuz it really seems like the kind of thing we should have popcorn for...
And here's to not being boring! ::raises mostly empty glass of wine:: Sweet potato pie!!
Cake,
Popcorn! Absolutely!
Only "boring" people neglect bringing Popcorn to watch their sibling crash their motorcycle during a race.
That's just retarded.
Thanks for the virtual 'sill pie, beamie!
Hey anunomess-
Thanks! Nice to know I'm just middle aged!
(by the way, what channel is the gameshow network on?)
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