For Real?
I recently drove by a small business called "The Electric Shaver Repair Shop."
I've been by it before and did the same "double-take" most slightly sane people must've done a million times before (not sure if I fit into that 'slightly sane'category, but I still had to adjust my eyes to make sure I didn't need to make an appointment with my opthropmoloeyeguygist.) The owners must be marketing geniuses; they've somehow managed to convince customers to FIX their broken electric razors instead of tossing them and going to Wal-Mart and buying a brand new one for, I dunno, 40 bucks? Microsoft should hire these guys. Unless it's just a front for a drug ring operation-THAT I could understand.
But when my friend Joanie told me I needed to go to "The Vacuum Cleaner Hospital" to buy carpet shampoo, I sudddenly developed a new respect for the small business owner.
Maybe I'll start some REAL competition and open a "Throwaway Razor Repair Shop."
Obviously the possibilities for a boss-free life are endless.
I've been by it before and did the same "double-take" most slightly sane people must've done a million times before (not sure if I fit into that 'slightly sane'category, but I still had to adjust my eyes to make sure I didn't need to make an appointment with my opthropmoloeyeguygist.) The owners must be marketing geniuses; they've somehow managed to convince customers to FIX their broken electric razors instead of tossing them and going to Wal-Mart and buying a brand new one for, I dunno, 40 bucks? Microsoft should hire these guys. Unless it's just a front for a drug ring operation-THAT I could understand.
But when my friend Joanie told me I needed to go to "The Vacuum Cleaner Hospital" to buy carpet shampoo, I sudddenly developed a new respect for the small business owner.
Maybe I'll start some REAL competition and open a "Throwaway Razor Repair Shop."
Obviously the possibilities for a boss-free life are endless.
posted by Bemisdown at 4:14 PM
19 Comments:
Scotch Tape Store
Bookstore with just "Chic Lit"
What the HELL was that??? (Not you Clinky..I'm referring to that lengthy message from OuterSpace)
Anyway...
"Slightly Used Underwear Emporium."
"Towels N' Stuff Stolen From Hotels."
dr.whoami,
Go to the nearest Emergency Room. Immediately.
Anunomess,
Swear to God... I've dated some questionable characters before, but not this guy.
YIKES!
Anunomess,
I tried to delete him, but he won't go away. Is there some spray or something I can use?
Wow.
Just...wow.
He's from Chapel Hill...usually a place where smart people reside.
Hey buddy,
Go study for your Western Civ test instead of being really creepy and posting retarded notes on random blogs.
Sorry you can't get a date-find something else to do with your time.
Now let's get back to what's really important:
"Just a Little Ripped Pantyhose Wharehouse."
Shit...Clinky's going to spellcheck me now.
There's this dude, every month, during the full moon, he transforms into a creature, half-man, half-house...
All evil must beware the Were-house!
Oh I just thought of the best store...and it's a real place...and I have a picture!
Now if I can just find it...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Damn, I can't find it...but it only sells staplers. Ha!
Okay...I'm gonna take Dr. Whammy's post point by point:
>>>>You have a riveting web log>>>>
Yup.
>>>and undoubtedly must have
atypical & quiescent potential
for your intended readership.<<<
She does!
>>>May I suggest that you do
everything in your power to
honor your encyclopedic/omniscient
Designer/Architect as well
as your revering audience.>>>>>
Nope.
>>>As soon as we acknowledge
this Supreme Designer/Architect,
Who has erected the beauteous
fabric of the universe, our minds
must necessarily be ravished with
wonder at His infinate goodness,
wisdom and power.>>>
Probably not.
>>Please remember to never
restrict anyone's opportunities
for ascertaining uninterrupted
existence for their quintessence.<<
OK
>>>There is a time for everything,
a season for every activity
under heaven. A time to be
born and a time to die. A
time to plant and a time to
harvest. A time to kill and
a time to heal. A time to
tear down and a time to
rebuild. A time to cry and
a time to laugh. A time to
grieve and a time to dance.
A time to scatter stones
and a time to gather stones.
A time to embrace and a
time to turn away. A time to
search and a time to lose.
A time to keep and a time to
throw away. A time to tear
and a time to mend. A time
to be quiet and a time to
speak up. A time to love
and a time to hate. A time
for war and a time for peace.>>>>>
As long as it doesn't interrupt prime time TV viewing.
>>>Here's what great men have
said about the world's best -
seller:<<<<
"I love when Wolverine shoots out his claws!"
>>>>"The Bible is no mere book, but a Living
Creature, with a power that conquers
all that oppose it." - Napoleon<<<<<
Napoleon was stupid.
>>>"That Book accounts for the supremacy
of England." - Queen Victoria<<<<
Nope.
>>>"If there is anything in my thought or
style to commend, the credit is due my
parents for instilling in me an early
love of the Scriptures. If we abide by
the principals taught in the Bible, our
country will go on prospering and to
prosper; but if we and our posterity
neglect its instructions and authority,
no man can tell how sudden a
catastrophe may overwhelm us and
bury all our glory in profound obscurity."
- Daniel Webster (Founding Father)>>>>>>>>>
I don't think so.
>>>"The Bible is worth all other books which
have ever been printed." - Patrick Henry
(original member of the Continental Congress)>>>>>>>>>>
especially on ebay if it's autographed.
>>>"The Bible is the anchor of our liberties."
- President U.S. Grant<<<<
What the fuck you talkin' about Willis?
>>>"It is impossible to enslave mentally or socially
a Bible-reading people. The principals of the
Bible are the groundwork of human freedom."
- Horace Greeley (Editor)<<<<<<<
tell that to the Amish.
>>>"That Book is the rock on which our Republic
rests." - President Andrew Jackson<<<
Rock paper scissors. Loser.
>>>"In all my perplexities and distresses, the Bible
has never failed to give me light and strength."
- Gen. Robert E. Lee>>>>>
How did that work out for you General 'Loser' Lee?
>>>"Bible reading is an education in itself."
- Lord Tennyson (Poet>>>>
Don't you know it.
>>>"So great is my veneration for the Bible that the
earlier my children begin to read it the more
confident will be my hope that they will prove
useful citizens of their country and respectable
members of society. I have formany years made
it a practice to read through the Bible once
every year." - President John Quincy Adams>>>>>
Liar.
>>>"The existence of the Bible, as a Book for the
people, is the greatest benefit which the human
race has ever experienced. Every attempt to
belittle it is a crime against humanity."
- Immanuel Kant (Philosopher)<<<<<
Nope.
>>>"The New Testament is the very best Book that
ever or ever will be known in the world."
- Charles Dickens (Author)>>>>
better than the Stand?
>>>>"All human discoveries seem to be made only
for the purpose of confirming more and more
strongly the truths contained in the Sacred
Scriptures." - Sir William Herschel (Astronomer)>>>>
What about dinosaurs?
>>"There are more sure marks of authenticity
in the Bible than in any profane history."
- Sir Isaac Newton (Scientist)>>>
What about the history of Apples?
>>>"Let mental culture go on advancing,
let the natural sciences progress in
even greater extent and depth, and
the human mind widen itself as much
as it desires; beyond the elevation
and moral culture of Christianity, as
it shines forth in the Gospels, it will
not go." - Goethe (Author)>>>>>
Goethe away jerk.
>>>"I have known ninety-five of the world's
great men in my time, and of these eight-
seven were followers of the Bible. The
Bible is stamped with a Specialty of Origin,
and an immeasurable distance separates
it from all competitors."
- W.E. Gladstone (Prime Minister)>>>>>
who was the eighth?
>>"Whatever merit there is in anything that
I have written is simply due to the fact that
when I was a chile my mother daily read
me a part of the Bible and daily made me
learn a part of it by heart." - John Ruskin
(art critic and social commentator)>>>>>
Dr Freud! Dr. Freud!
>>>"The Bible has been the Magna Charta of the
poor and oppressed. The human race is not
in a position to dispense with it." - Thomas
Huxley (Author & Scientist)<<<<<
I loved that on every episode Dr. Huxley would wear a differnt sweater.
>>>"The whole hope of human progress is
suspended on the ever growing influence
of the Bible." - W.H. Seward (Secretary of State>>>>>)
And smaller micro-chips.
>>>"America was born a Christian nation. America
was born to exemplify that devotion to the
elements of righteousness, which are derived
from the revelations of Holy Scriptures. Part
of the destiny of Americans lies in their daily
perusal of this great book of revelations.
That if they would see America free and
pure they will make their own spirits free
and pure by this baptism of the Holy Spirit."
--President Woodrow Wilson>>>>
Maybe.
>>>For Christians, the life and death of Jesus
are the ultimate expressions of love, and
the supreme demonstrations of God's
mercy, faithfulness, and redemption.
Since Christ's miraculous Resurrection
on Easter, more than 2,000 years ago,
Christians have expressed joy and
gratitude for this wondrous sacrifice
and for God's promise of freedom for
the oppressed, healing for the broken -
hearted, and salvation. --President
George W. Bush>>>>>>>>
But we can still bomb folks, correct? Can we please? Pretty please?
>>>"It cannot be emphasized too strongly
or too often that this great nation was
founded, not by religionists, but by
Christians; not on religions, but on
the gospel of Jesus Christ. For this
very reason peoples of other faiths
have been afforded asylum, prosperity,
and freedom of worship here."
--Patrick Henry (original member
of the Continental Congress)>>>>
I got nothing for this one.
>>>God designed humans to want to
believe in something. That's the
image of God that is in us. But as
G. K. Chesterton famously put it,
when we reject the God of the
Bible, we don't believe in nothing;
we believe in everything -- including
Little Green Men. - - Chuck Colson>>>>>
Christian Little Green Men.
>>>I am trying here to prevent anyone from
saying the really foolish thing that people
often say about Jesus Christ: "I'm ready
to accept Jesus as a great moral teacher,
but I don't accept His claim to be God."
That is the one thing we must not say.
A man who was merely a man and said
the sort of things Jesus said would not be
a great moral teacher. He would either be
a lunatic -- on a level with a man who says
he is a poached egg -- or else he would be
the Devil of Hell.
You must make your choice. Either this Man
was, and is, the Son of God, or else a madman
or something worse .... You can shut Him up
for fool, you can spit at Him and kill Him as a
demon; or you can fall at His feet and call Him
Lord and God. But let us not come up with any
patronizing nonsense about His being a great
human teacher. He has not left that option
open to us. He did not intend to. -- From
Case for Christianity, by C.S. Lewis>>>>>>>>
::my mind is numbing over:::
>>>"Let every student be plainly instructed and
earnestly pressed to consider well the main
end of his life and studies is to know God
and Jesus Christ which is eternal life (John
17:3)." - - - The Laws and Statutes of
Harvard College in 1643>>>>
Folks dug this Jesus guy, huh? He's the Sally Field of Son of Gods
>>>"All scholars shall live religious, godly,
and blameless lives according to the rules
of God's Word, diligently reading the Holy
Scriptures, the fountain of light and truth;
and constantly attend upon all the duties
of religion, both in public and secret."
- - - Two central requirements in Yale
College 1745 charter
If you stop believing what your professor
told you had to be true and if you start
thinking for yourself you may come to some
conclusions you hadn't expected. You may
find the Bible makes more sense than you
thought or were told to think. Allow yourself
to be ruined, ruined with regard to what you
always thought could be true. Can you believe
what you don't understand? You and I believe
everyday what we don't understand unless it
comes to the issue of salvation.
- - - Dr. Woodrow Kroll>>>>>>
Who is this Sal Vation you speak of? The guy down at the North End?
>>>>There is simply no historic foundation for the
position that the Framers intended to build the
'wall of separation' that was constitutionalized
in Everson. The 'wall of separation between
church and state' is a metaphor based on bad
history, a metaphor which has proved useless
as a guide to judging. It should be frankly and
explicitly abandoned. - - - Chief Justice of
the US Supreme Court, William Rehnquist>>>>
Wrong...look on page 122. It says it right there.
>>>>In 1796 the US Supreme Court issued this
ruling, "By our form of government, the
Christian religion is the established religion,
and all sects and denominations of Christians
are placed on equal footing." Some 57 years
later, after Congress was petitioned to separate
Christian principles from government, in 1853
the House Judiciary Committee issued their
formal report, including these words: "In this
age there is no substitute for Christianity.
This was the religion of the founders of the
republic, and they expected it to be the
religion of their dependents. The great vital,
conservative elements in our system is the
belief of our people in the pure doctrines
and divine truths of the gospel of Jesus
Christ." - - - Dr. Gerald Beavan>>>>
I like Gospel, Rock, Blues...it's all good.
>>>"It is the duty of nations, as well as of men,
to own their dependence upon the overruling
power of God and to recognize the sublime
truth announced in the Holy Scriptures and
proven by all history, that those nations only
are blessed whose God is the Lord."
-- President Abraham Lincoln>>>>
Keep in mind that Abe fell in love with Mary Todd. Take it for whats its worth.
>>>>Trust in yourself and you are doomed to
disappointment; trust in money and you
may have it taken from you; but trust in
God, and you are never to be confounded
in time or eternity. - D.L. Moody
Faith and love are apt to be spasmodic
in the best of minds. Men and women live
on the brink of mysteries and harmonies
into which they never enter and with their
hand on the doorlatch they die outside.
- - GK Chesterton
Best wishes for continued ascendancy,
Dr. Whoami
P.S. Here's some blogs that I found
of interest as I negotiated my way
through cyberspace:>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
Thank you. Please come again. Often.
::cheering::
WOW Nooprah. I'm impressed.
I didn't know you were such a biblical scholar. You should invite Dr. Whammy out for Buddy Night-he sounds like a blast to have around. Just pick him up in a stretch limo with a blonde inside.
WOW Nooprah. I'm impressed.
I didn't know you were such a biblical scholar. You should invite Dr. Whammy out for Buddy Night-he sounds like a blast to have around. Just pick him up in a stretch limo with a blonde inside.
Thanks anunomess.
I think Dr. Whammy gave me a cold.
Post a Comment
<< Home