Lunch

Because, collectively, my family has the IQ of a garden type variety snake, some of my siblings have very specific rules about food, particularly lunch.

The lunch debate dates back years, and since we are a group that can have a prolonged discussion about what constitutes a "cookout," or what type of tomatoes are allowed to be used in a sauce (I was not personally part of that discussion since besides being a New Englander who's never been to Fenway Park, I'm also an Italian woman who has NEVER made spaghetti sauce-my siblings just shook their heads in disgust when I revealed THAT little secret), you can imagine how "heated" the lunch debate has become.

The argument is really between my sister Joanne (who has rules about pretty much EVERYTHING-she should have been a prison guard) and my brother Richard.

According to Richard, "lunch" can constitute just about anything-meatloaf with mashed potatoes and gravy, a plate of pasta with meatballs, fried chicken...whatever's being served up.

Joannne finds this line of thinking inconceivable. Lunch, in her mind, is not "Dinner Lite." A tuna sandwich with chips, perhaps a bowl of soup with a salad...those are acceptable lunch items. But in her mind anyone who thinks they're eating "lunch" when the menu involves mashed potatoes and gravy is just fooling themselves.

This disagreement has been going on for years, and neither side is willing to give an inch. I think it's time to take it to the United Nations.